Monday, February 6, 2012

Stages Of Grief - Sexuality

Ok – here it is, I’m going to talk about sex, that forbidden topic that no one wants to bring up.  What do you think of when the word sex is mentioned?  Most of us tend to be interested, but scared and we react emotionally.  But the truth is that sex is over emphasized and glamorized by society as a whole.

The funny thing is that married couples think single people get all the action and are free to get all they want, anytime, anyplace - and single people think that married couples are the ones that are having all the fun.
In reality, a widow often finds the hassle of sexuality the most trying in starting up another relationship.  Having a loving husband made having a sexual life easy and comfortable.  Just because our husbands are gone doesn’t mean our sexual needs automatically go away
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Most widows are more or less terrified by the thought of dating again, especially if it’s been years and the dating rules have changed.  They feel old, unattractive, unsure of themselves and fearful of the unknown.  Also, no matter what our age we still hear our parents telling us to be good girls.  At this stage we may even find our grown children telling us the same thing.

No wonder dating is confusing and uncertain when you are a widow.  I can’t give you any magic words of wisdom on this issue.  Everyone has their own moral compass about what is right or wrong.  What I do know is that sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith if it feels right because otherwise you may miss the chance to have another great guy in your life.  On the other side it can be easy to get mixed up with the wrong guy, so listen to your heart and be careful but not fearful.

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